I got the news this week: I did not get accepted into Eastern's SLP grad program in Winter. I called during school, and had to leave the class because I was crying. I knew that this was a possibility, but it's still really disappointing to hear no. The head of the admissions selection committee broke the news to me, and she urged me to apply again for Fall. I plan to apply again, in addition to two other programs.
Maybe this isn't the field I belong in. I wanted it so bad, and now I'm second-guessing myself. I know that I'm expecting everything to just fall into place magically, but it's not. Darin keeps reminding me that this recession is taking a toll on a lot of people, and that there's just going to be more college graduates emerging to compete for the little bit of jobs available. I know that things will get better. But it's been really hard for me to see the light at the end of the tunnel.
Getting rejected by my program has been a huge blow to the ego. "I'm not good enough, I'm a failure", were the thoughts that went through my head. But I'm trying to view this as a small hurdle on the way to where I'm going. I'm going to retake the GRE, apply to a couple other schools and other programs, maybe even re-examine my career path. And I'm going to keep my head up, and remind myself that I am worthwhile. I am talented.
I also need to remember to live just for today. I need to do what I can today before I can worry about tomorrow.
4 comments:
I'm not sure what SLP is, as I just started following you. And no words ever soften the blow of not getting into something you wanted so bad. But try to remember it's not neccessarily a rejection, as a "we've run out of room". And they say, and they SHOULD say, the greats never get what they want right away. That goes for you. It's all objective and a "not now" is really just that, or a "not here" but it is not a "no." and you control that. :)
I'm sorry to hear about your disappointment Erika. I do know that its a lot harder to get accepted into a program in the winter than it is for the fall anywhere you apply for any program. Most colleges prefer you start in the fall for some reason...at least this is what U of M admissions told me when I was not accepted into their Information Science program int he Winter of 2009, same kind of disappointment.
You're right it is not a comment on you, keep your chin up and stay positive. Maybe it just wasn't meant to be because something better is coming along.
Thanks Cole and Angela, for reading and for your kind words. I'm hoping I get accepted in the Fall semester!
It's terrible to get news like that. Your constant positivity is something I've always admired in you and the fact that you can still see a path to go in such a tough situation is impressive and just shows how strong you are. You'll find the right place for you, sometimes it just takes a couple tries.
Post a Comment